I miss my hair. :(

I want to scream my lungs out.

I want to cry my eyeballs out.

I want to reap something off.

I wish I was somewhere deserted with no one there so I can scream it out that :

I MISS MY HAIR! :p

LOL. Its Good Friday today for the Christians :)

I attended the mass just now but honestly, I'm still blur. I mean of course It's been a long long time since I attended mass.I know how to pray but other than that, I'm totally blur about everything.

When I was in mass just now, I kept thinking and wondering :

• whether I was pretending that I was listening.
• whether my heart's really with God.
• whether I still do believe in God.
• whether I was praying the right way.
• whether I'm really a good person inside.
  
• whether people will look at me in a weird way cos I'm so blur about it.

Ok I admit, I'm not that holy after all. ahaha holy -.- But to me, the most important thing is to be a good person. A person with loads with love inside and no hatred - thats what God's about. I may be blur in church and lost but I believe that I'm still part of it if I remain as a good person .I want to be a good person:)

Anyway, life still goes on the same. No news,no outings,no anything. I feel like as if I'm the only one left here in Kuantan. Honestly, sometimes I feel like I'm so anti-social. LOL. But when I think about it, I have loads of friends but I don't know why I can't find them when I need them.LOL.

But the ones who have left, I can say that sometimes I'm really dissapointed with some of them. Some of them who forget their old friends. Some of them who goes to a new place and then forget the old one. The ones who moved on and forget where they came from.. Don't get me wrong, not all of them are like that. Just 'some' :) I understand that everyone wants to be 'in' in a happening place. I mean who doesn't. 'In' is just so cool. I want to be 'in' too. But wanting and being 'in' doesn't mean you have to forget your old self. You can be 'in' and as cool as you want but what is there to show off when you're ain't yourself anymore. That is just plain naive! -.-

I miss my hair now. I swear when my hair grows beautifully again, I'll style and dye it as much as I want shish. :p I wish my hair grows 10 times the speed then I will be so ready for the Seventeen photoshoot. *BIG smile*

I've always wanted long hair with hot bangs like this but it's a big no no for a chubby face like mine.

Miley Cyrus's hair is perfecto. I want my hair to be like that. Love the blondee!!!
I think I'll do this when I'm 20. haha notice the red heels on Avril. HOT!

Anyway, Amanda Overmyer from American Idol was eliminated this week. Eliminated, I'm telling ya GRR! The bottom three was Carly Smithson , Amanda and Kristy Lee Cook. Unexpected, Unbelievable. Carly and Amanda's the two powerful contestants in the competition. They just happen to did bad this week. People, pay attention to the vocals. Argh, I hate competitions where the one with the most votes WIN. Unfair :( Amandaaaa!! Nyahaha =P

I think I gotta start working again. I was thinking about Converse, then I can pop both of my eyeballs out looking at every new arrivals. New old school sneakers. Then I'll have loads and loads of sneakers. I'll fill my shoe closet with so many sneakers until my closet pukes them all out. hehe dramatic.
Honest, mine only occupies 10% of the closet. My mum is a complete maniac over heels. But nevermind, I will soon inherit them .* when I can walk in heels properly -.-*

Few of my sneakers.

But I think I am having hormonal change- oestrogen or progesterone I don't know. Cos I'm leaving my tomboyish skater and simple me to be so ladylike ,me myself couldn't believe.- i don't know why.keke.

Things that I use to avoid until I turned 17 last November. *okay I'm 18 this year :p* :

• Heels. Silly, I thought I will I look old in them.
• Girlish clothes with any flowers printed on them. Okay, I want them now.
• Handbags. Now I crave for more day by day.
• Slow romantic songs. Girly girly and mushy mushy songs. And I LISTEN to them now.

Yeap, these are the things that occur when a girl's 17 turning 18. hahaha~
And, now.. Anna wears heels and wedges-.- tadaa! *smiles*




I need to work again until I start studying- to earn money. I bought gifts for mum and sister- but not for my dad. So, yeah.. I need to work to buy him one. And of course, I want to shop! I need a new closet. :)

See, I went for a drink at Alif after mass with mum and sis. I was left with rm13 from Eastgrill the other day and rm12 gone for treating them now. So total: my miserable rm1 and some old receipts that I'm lazy to throw them away. wakaka :p
EMPTY.
I ate my money. hahaha i sounded like as if I'm that money minded. hahaha :P
My sister, Belle. Darn happy cos get to hang out until 12am. ahaha.

Plus I need to find a job. I'm stoning at home, with nothing better else to do. Sleeps at 4am every night and wakes up with big baggy fugly eye bags the next day. Very unhealthy. I will go crazy -.- But for now , still straight ( yea I'm straight okay. lol :p ) and alive and happy like usual.

xoxo's


p/s : Carol , I want to be there for you at Taylors. But sigh. ( again, I'm straight :D)